I am a 25-year-old 3rd Grader

I've always really wanted a cool job like Tom Hanks did in "BIG". Back when that movie came out, I thought designing and testing toys would be the best job a person could have. That was back when action figures were still cool, though. Back when we (me and those unfortunate enough to hang out with me) would have funerals for our brave GI Joes that fell in the war against Cobra.

Now the action figure market suffers from merchandising overkill. Mattel currently ranks among the worst with their over merchandising of Batman. We have such awful incarnations as "Artic Wing" Batman, or "Crocodile Armor" Batman. Batman lives in Gotham City... defending Gotham probably doesn't require special Eskimo or Steve Irwin powers. I swear, every time I open an issue of Toy Fare at Charles's house (Geek comrade) we spurn at the crap that passes for Batman toys. In fact, Charles and I thought we could create something at least as awful without even trying. And thus our new action figure was born. Before you comment on how horrible the Photoshop is, Charles turned this out in the time it took me to eat a 2-inch stack of Pringles.

In other news, my brother finally updated his blog. What a rare occasion today is. Now if you'll excuse me, I have 5 hours left of my shift, and a lot of Anti-Bush game to play.